thank you for your message asking how i am now
It would be easiest to respond with
"good, how are you"
or a more long-winded reply to acknowledge the concern and care intended in the question, skin deep
but
i'm not so good, and i don't know where to go from there
my ills, pains, heavy heart are still there yet i realise, more than ever, that life's too short to dwell on errors or suffering
and, more importantly, i know the solution can only be to give of myself
to show kindness and caring and thoughtfulness
to volunteer
to get busy living or...
things i knew before but i know in a deeper sense now
but along with that 'depth' i feel a numb sadness like a heavy wet cloth covering dampening my flame
struggling to fully engage with a life here that i would trade for a life in Peru tomorrow if i could
if i don't practice conscious engagement, will i grow so numb that i won't be able to suddenly reawaken when i get to Peru?
"tomorrow i will start to live"
how many more tomorrows?
will the world still be there waiting for me?
Spring is in the air
and in my veins
let it flow
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
those of you who've known me well will hardly be surprised by any of these thoughts, though, so similar are they to the stuff i might have spouted/declared 10 years ago, or 20
yet had you been there at all times you'd also know the wild optimism (of youth?)
still stirring in slumber
como se dice esquizofrenia?
mirando hacia el Arbol de la Vida
solo Ometeotl
It would be easiest to respond with
"good, how are you"
or a more long-winded reply to acknowledge the concern and care intended in the question, skin deep
but
i'm not so good, and i don't know where to go from there
my ills, pains, heavy heart are still there yet i realise, more than ever, that life's too short to dwell on errors or suffering
and, more importantly, i know the solution can only be to give of myself
to show kindness and caring and thoughtfulness
to volunteer
to get busy living or...
things i knew before but i know in a deeper sense now
but along with that 'depth' i feel a numb sadness like a heavy wet cloth covering dampening my flame
struggling to fully engage with a life here that i would trade for a life in Peru tomorrow if i could
if i don't practice conscious engagement, will i grow so numb that i won't be able to suddenly reawaken when i get to Peru?
"tomorrow i will start to live"
how many more tomorrows?
will the world still be there waiting for me?
Spring is in the air
and in my veins
let it flow
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
those of you who've known me well will hardly be surprised by any of these thoughts, though, so similar are they to the stuff i might have spouted/declared 10 years ago, or 20
yet had you been there at all times you'd also know the wild optimism (of youth?)
still stirring in slumber
como se dice esquizofrenia?
mirando hacia el Arbol de la Vida
solo Ometeotl
